Past FORWARD

Does breaking up with your boyfriend, signal the end of knowing his friends? Actually, it shouldn't

You are at your favourite coffee joint, when you spot the familiar faces, and freeze. It's them! The only identity of that bond now remains as 'Oh gosh, they are my ex's pals!"

Not a race...

Your instant reaction would probably be to put on your sneakers, and just run! Rest assured, it will only make things worse. Stay put. And smile. That's the least you can do. Remember it's him, and not his friends, that you dated. For all you know, maybe they aren't friends anymore!

Friend in need...

Life is a circle, and you never know who might be of help on a precarious turn. Says Amber Khan, 25, media professional, "My boyfriend's friends are well connected in the industry. After we broke up, I lost my job and my apartment too. Life took a complete nosedive and I didn't know who to turn for help." Aid came to her from her ex's buddies, in fact. "I didn't let my break-up affect my equation with them. And today, they are more my friends than his," she smiles.

Tracking em' down...

If you want to find out about his whereabouts, they are the best source. And in case statements like 'I need space', I have a boys' night out' were common in the relationship, his friends are your weapons to find out if he ever cheated on you. Confesses, Anahita Modi, 23, "My boyfriend was not interested in a girl at work. This information came from his friend during one of our "let's catch up meets'! That really helped me to move on."

Win them over...

What a sweet revenge, if your ex's friends go out of their way to vouch for you! It will sure make him change colours. And, you never know, he may just come running back to you!

Two to tango?

Now the most obvious reason: His best buddy! Naomi Matthew, 29, during her whirlwind romance, always felt more connected to her boyfriend's best friend. "After our break-up, he (her ex's friend) became my pillar of strength. When I started falling for him, I was skeptical if it was a rebound. But I gave it a shot, and after five years, we said 'I do'", she says.

WORDS OF CAUTION

- If your relationship was very serious, and just one step short of the altar, keeping in touch with your ex's friends may make it difficult to move on.

- High risk of a rebound relationship. So, hold your horses before jumping into another disaster.

- Your current boyfriend may feel insecure about the strong ties with your past.