The EX Box

His ex-girlfriend still looms large over his memories. Instead of firefighting the past, plot your present

It's the Pandora's Box you wish you didn't chance upon. The Pandora in question here is the pretty damsel your man was dating, before you.

Trash the memory book

KEY: You and he go for coffee. But before the first sip, he becomes nostalgic, about how he held 'her' hand for the first time over coffee.

LOCK: "It hurt me a lot that every time we went out for a date, my boyfriend would reminisce about the good times he spent with his ex. I disliked being the 'understanding second girl' all the time," says Shireen Miller, 23.

To stop her self esteem from taking a nose drive, she made up an imaginary 'ex boyfriend'. The trips to nostalgia reached a dead end.

The friendly excuse

KEY: The most common dilemma 'we are still friends' is the most dreaded one. He still meets her, and your nerves go into a tizzy. Though it's not impossible to be friends, continued interactions with an ex can take a toll on your new blossoming romance.

LOCK: This is a trick one. You don't want to be the 'possessive insecure new woman' in his life. So, apply the three's great company' rule here. As Shalaka, who was facing this dilemma, offers, "I didn't want to be a control freak as that would only cause endless arguments. So I began accompanying my boyfriend whenever he would go to meet his ex." Though there was resentment to this initially, Shalaka explained to her guy that she love spending time with 'his' friends.

Climbing the family tree

KEY: Every time you interact with his family, you get subtle hints of their loyalty of his 'first love'. You wonder if the replacement surgery has gone wrong.

LOCK: This definitely dents your heart but patience is the keyword here. "I would dread meeting his family. They made me feel like a man-stealer," rues Andrea D'Souza, marketing executive.

Accomodate the commodity

KEY: Those sweet gifts that were passes between them are hard to ignore. You can't throw them, so either substitute or accept their presence.

LOCK: "Every time he would bring out the wallet she gifted him, I would cringe. So I got him another," says Sharon Porter, 25.

How to disguise a promiscuous past from a new man